i was to post a wrathful entry about how i simply don't understand certain things and also about a surprising find that disgusts me ) : boohoohoo! i shouldn't be in such a foul mood ) :

BUT i've decided to be happier!!! cause 2008's almost here and this time, i especially like the idea of a new year! i feel more certain of myself and am glad to have found the zest to work hard! all in all, i smell better days ahead! cause... i've got a direction- i've got my resolutions! though new years just mean a change of organisers/diaries and writing new digits at the corner of your foolscape, i'm really really really excited!!! and i can't wait for tonight! ( :

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!




i've decided to skip work today!!! okay, it's irresponsible but bad habits die hard and i'm ill !!! it's a convenient excuse : ) tom will be edlyn's 21st and her party's tonight!i can be there early!
preview!


come to think of it, all good things come after sacrifices. my opportunity cost of ponning work today would be $35 (i'm so ready to give up the miserable amount i get after being a statue for 7hours) but i would have to give up going to the zoo with my primary sch classmates cause it would mean that i can't pon tom, my last day of work. YAY to end of work! but i won't be able to see this other promoter, jermaine, today. i like hanging out with her very much. ahh! now i'm looking forward to my first kbox (okie, im a noob), shopping and making jer impart his know-how to me so i can learn to bake the fabulous cheesecake toooo. oh did i say that i am sucha bad cook? ): it wasn't sucha merry kiss-mas for my folks who had to stuff my wierd food down their throats. 1.minestrone which was served only at 10pm cause i took so long at the three supermarkets and cause i'm just slow. 2.failed fish fillet which was um, half-cooked. 3.the worse must have been the cheese omelette fried rice, bland and unappetizing. 4.okay, probably only the garlic bread was edible.

and yes, i love my hunk of a xmas gift from my bestie! pun totally intended! it was indeed a double surprise! :D i can't wait to party too! lovelove my best and fav crazy girl!


ohoh, i can't wait for kl! gotta grab what's left of the hols to have fun!
school's about to start and life would be so different. i've shifted out of hall and come next sem, sis would be at vienna. i will be missing you girls oh so much =(
my lovely dearies of 87-88, here's a toast to better days!

featuring brenda and our very well-maintained toilet! :D


days of our woodcraft craze


this is just one of the many retarded pictures we have. HAHA!




I’ve gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I am a hostage to my own humanity

- - -

yesterday, while i was rooted to the ground during work, i read a few really meaningful articles and i thought of my dear friend. i really hope she's alright now.

- - -

fact of the day
Jan 24, World Belly Laugh Day
(coincidentally, it's also din's birthday! and the opening of 27dresses!!! vic!)
-It is fantastic to have one day in a year where you mark a health occasion through laughter. Even looking forward to having a good laugh can boost your immune system and reduce stress. A University of California-Irvine study shows that even knowing you will be involved in a positive humorous event days in advance reduces levels of stress hormones in the blood and increases levels of chemicals known to aid relaxation. Playful laughing fuels positive energy, creativity and connection, boosts immune functions and increases pain tolerance. Laughter appears to cause the tissue that forms the inner lining of blood vessels, the endothelium, to dilate or expand in order to increase blood flow. We become more alert, creative, and think better after a laugh, so grab your pals today for a good old belly laugh to boost your moods.

2008 looks good! at least, there'll be a good start. let's COUNTDOWN!


dear friends, sorry for "locking" up my blog for the past two days cause i've been trying to revamp it. so to my verymuchloved, oneandonly roomie, thank you for the very sweet entry and fyi, while this blog was still under construction, noone was "invited" to read. so sulk no more! :D well, this new design isn't any close to the ideal peach-coloured vintage design i had in mind but i've decided to just use it in the meantime.

sigh. results day seemed like an ultra bad day for quite a few people but what's done is done. i only have myself to blame. for now, it's sticking to 2008's resolution of not ponning lects and tuts =(

It takes a crane to build a crane
It takes two floors to make a story
It takes an egg to make a hen
It takes a hen to make an egg
There is no end to what I'm saying

It takes a thought to make a word
And it takes some words to make an action
It takes some work to make it work
It takes some good to make it hurt
It takes some bad for satisfaction

La la la la la la la
life is wonderful
a life goes full circle
life is wonderful

It takes a night to make it dawn
And it takes a day to make you yawn brother
And it takes some old to make you young
It takes some cold to know the sun
It takes the one to have the other

And it takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
It takes some fears to make you trust
It takes those tears to make it rust
It takes the dust to have it polished

It takes some silence to make sound
It takes a loss before you found it
And it takes a road to go nowhere
It takes a toll to make you care
It takes a hole to make a mountain

life is wonderful,jason mraz
if it were a song that sings the beauty of life because of the ups and downs,
why do i hear the sadness in its tune?

i've learnt that
perpetual failing breeds cynicism
i will not look back again
never to walk the steps i've taken
only to make the same errs ceaselessly



here's the third track of a totally kick-ass album! (:
love the beat!it's a great morning song (:

I'm walking down Broadway
Each footstep is a new love letter
I'm trying to make eye contact
With each and every stranger that I pass
I'm thinking about the city
It's living proof people need to be together
I'm thinking about how I just wanna open up
And give and give and give

And its ok for you to care
Cos I can feel you in the air
And while you wonder
How's this gonna end
I only wanted to begin

I'm thinking about desire
I've had to learn how to sin successfully
I'm thinking about bliss
And bliss is all dressed up and there's no one to dance with
Remembering her smile
And the nuclear bomb and the reasons I loved her
I'm walking through central park
I'm in a foreign country and I'm waiting for a sign

And its ok for you to care
Cos I'm not going anywhere
And while you wonder
If you should let me in
I only wanted to begin

I'm still singing
Twisting new melodies, breaking arrangements
I'm thinking about my heart
I guess youve heard, sometimes its heavy
But I just keep moving
When I hit a wall I look up at the sky
I'm thinking about my maker
And despite all this I know she wont give up on me

And its ok for you to care
Cos I can taste you everywhere
And while its true all straight things must bend
I only wanted to begin

~Ben Lee, Begin


Clarke quay will never fail to melt me.
tonight, we chanced upon this pub which i think is called BB house; it's just beside the GMax station.
there's a really awesome singer who even dedicated a song, "Chasing Cars", to us! (:

The night was too beautiful,
even bitter beer tastes sweet.
I couldn't hold back
my tears that glisten in the night lights.

This is our beautiful end.



We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
~Chasing Cars


enchanted
A classic Disney fairytale collides with modern-day New York City in a story about a fairytale princess from the past who is thrust into present-day by an evil queen. Soon after her arrival, Princess Giselle begins to change her views on life and love after meeting a handsome lawyer.

Can a storybook view of romance survive in the real world?



i remember that there was a scene in which Robert, the male lead, was arguing with Giselle as he tried to tell her that happilyeverafter doesn't exist. as i recalled, it dawned on me that like Giselle, i do have such fantasies of fairytale-like love, to the extent that i even believe in love at first sight! i'm a true believer of fate. but maybe Robert wasn't being too cynical. life can be harsh sometimes. there are many obstacles that pull people apart. we think positively by saying that it's the ups and downs in life/love that makes it meaningful and exciting. i cant help but wonder, am i too child-like to be still believing in fairytales?


-sings the AHHH~! (we call it the bimbo warcry! cause when she does that, the animals will respond to her call and flood in to help her with the household chores!)

- - -

in an older post (possibly sometime in oct?), i had promised to talk about this image quotient book that i thought belonged to tim. so today, i flipped through it a lil and found this description that really fits me. haha

"What is your style?"
Our choice of clothes is influenced by our body structure, our profession and our lifestyle. Our own personal style is determined by our inner personality and reflects an attitude, or an interpretation of fashion. Whether you like it or not, your clothes are talking... Do you know what they are saying?

We classify the different wardrobe preferences into four general types of personalities: the Dramatic, the Romantic, the Classic and the Natural.

The Romantic
The Romantic loves people. She is bubbly and chats freely about many subjects. She wiggles when she walks and giggles when she talks. She is easy to get to know and likes to experiment with fashion trends and colours. Anything pretty attracts her and she does not dull herself with too many neutrals.
She prefers long, flowing and feminine styles; cannot resist anything pretty or sexy, and tends to over-accessorise. She is aware of fashion trends and has a fetish for shoes - she cannot walk by a shoe shop without looking in!
extracted from "Enhance your image quotient" by Suzenne Zheng

LOL! i thought the last point was the most apt! cause i'm really crazy about shoes!!
now, read about the romantic man! it's a little off though.
The Romantic man is often seen sporting a pony tail, wearing suspenders or a bow tie. (who wears those in asia?!) He takes the trouble to dress up for any occasion and enjoys shopping, unlike most men.
alrighty, bimbo moment's over.

Disney facts for today
Walt Disney World in Orlando, Florida, has been closed only one day since it opened in 1971. Hurricane Floyd on September 15, 1999, was the cause for the closure.

Walt Disney World is home to the largest working wardrobe in the world with more than 2.5 million costumes in its inventory.


Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don't want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight
It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain

The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes

All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Tonight
Insight
When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight.




The weight of things that remaind unspoken
Built up so much it crushed us everyday

-maroon 5, won't go home without you


while walking home from work, i had this urge to find a quiet place to sit and think. just to think about nonsense and to clear my mind of all the fuzzy stuff. i've been having this feeling for days but don't get me wrong. i was not feeling upset. it's just that having things sorted out makes me clearer and a tad happier. uhh... i wish to blog about happier things too cause i like reading blogs that are light-hearted. i like friends to share my joy and laugh about my little funny incidents. but i realised that i couldn't really do that. cause i also want my entries to be of my genuine feelings and my exact thoughts. but i'll still try :)

it's true that i've been in a bad shape lately. caught the flu bug together with a semi-husky voice (sexyyy aye...) and a pimple-infested face. the oil seeds are sprouting! big sighs! but i don't pull a long face at work cause the other promoters can be quite fun to hang around. i made two new friends today and i got three sample items! lol! okie, cheapo. :X and so... being in a bad shape and having internal struggles make me want to avoid people because running away is easy. you only have to sulk to yourself and not affect anyone around you. geex. okies. it's not really like that anymore. i'm looking forward to next week. my three days off work are packed with activities! settler's, steamboat cum stayover in hall, receiving my glass slipper and the long overdue cheesecake, pool and arcade, gyming with estelle steph, mambo and meeting shyn lyn and vicvic! :D :D



Country roads, take me home,
to the place I belong.
West Virginia,
Mountain momma,
Take me home country roads
All my mem'ries, gather round her,
miner's lady, stranger to blue water.
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky,
misty taste of moonshine
teardrop in my eye.
Country roads, take me home,
to the place I belong.
West Virginia,
Mountain momma,
Take me home Country roads

earlier today, i heard a faint familiar tune on my way to dreadful work. it was country roads!!! three santa buskers (actually, they were old men who looked like buskers and they donned santa hats.) were singing it and playing the guitar too! how happy i was! i wish i could stop and listen for a while longer. i was so full of envy. despite their age, they were beautiful singers. i couldnt help but softly "sing" along a little before feeling embarrassed. you know, people might find you psychotic when you look like you're talking to yourself. so, i hummed.

it's a nice oldie that brings back lotsa good memories. one such would be our bumpy ride on the van in phuket. we were on our way to white water rafting. there was much excitement in our voices and we could hardly contain our joy. so we started singing! i loved it especially when we sang country roads! it was really apt cause we were just driving on a long road with grassy plains on both sides. we just went on and on, like the road that knows no end. phuket was an amazing trip! i still remember suffering post-phuket syndromes. i just kept replaying country roads and singing it for the next few days! haha

okay. it's a long whiny post again. i'm starting my "beautify myself" campaign. i've just coated myself with some lotion and tom morning, i'll visit the doctor. meanwhile, i'll be good and keep to 8 glasses of water everyday. it has to be beauty's best companion! right now, i'm gonna treat my nails to a new shine. geex. there's still kl to plan and macau/hk! i havent forgotten okay...

return of the fact of the day
a festive special :D

1. According to a 1997 Gallup poll, 29 percent of Americans found the Christmas holidays more stressful than enjoyable. Those with the lowest incomes were most likely to find the season stressful, perhaps reflecting their inability to participate fully in the commercial, gift-giving aspects of the holiday.

2. According to the National Christmas Tree Association, Americans buy 37.1 million real Christmas trees each year; 25 percent of them are from the nation's 5,000 choose-and-cut farms.
lol. the wierd associations that people set up!

3. Christmas has different meanings in different countries. Christmas Eve in Japan is a good day to eat fried chicken and strawberry shortcake.
are they serious?!? i've gotta check with people who have jap friends! fried chicken in place of turkey! and shortcakes to replace logcakes! lol lol!


great video! enjoy! :D
oh yes, there's a curly hair cutie! lol



-relient k, who i am hates who i've been




this time,
i've fallen
into a dark abyss

there's no end to it
unless
...



regret. i've never liked this word.
certainly, i would never wanna live in regret for the things i have done/have not done. i've always tried to make decisions such that i will not regret my actions in future. but it always happens and i really detest myself for that. had i been less distracted, i would have kept to the promise i made to myself and probably, she would have been better and things wouldnt be the way they are today. all i do is wallow in self-pity and bury myself in my own troubles.

there's no point crying over spilt milk. i keep telling myself to be forward-looking and to find a solution. i need to compile a list of to-dos, get down to doing them and meet the people i want to meet, before it's too late.

to my bestie, sorry that i ruined betty night again.

i really wished i was smarter. then maybe, i could remember more things. i could be more efficient and i would manage my time better. i could have done so much more things. but then again, i can't blame it on that. ultimately, it's sincerity that counts. did i even have that in the first place? what i promised myself could be so easily forgotten? i was certain that my little effort would have made a difference so why didnt i carry it through?

i've learned that there are some things that you have to live and learn because you can turn back time nor make up for it. it's too little, too late.


here's one really cute video -whistles-




i think i've got an affinity with aunties. lol. first was the HSA auntie who still remembers me and which seat i sat on though I last saw her a couple of months ago. i could remember her too! then, on my first day of work on thur, this auntie was really nice cause she tried to help me promote my stuff. soon enough, we were chatting and she started holding my hand! "such gorgeous fingers!" she chirped. true true! :P she's chinese, 6 months pregnant and really amiable. i became friends with two other aunties and this 22 year old malaysian girl, Yuki! she's got flawless complexion!-swoons-

they are my lunch companions now. previously, i had intended to make my ipod, dan brown and comfy seats at hdb hub my lunch necessities. sigh. work is so demoralising when you know your agent sucks away about half your pay and you can't push sales when there are barely any customers in the entire store! :( there were a few times that i counted only 4 souls in the whole shop! i feel so exasperated now that i know i definitely won't hit the quota no matter how hard i try. oh, unless i bring in a microphone... big sigh

that was much digression. i was to talk about my new friend, Yuki. we clicked really well cause we've got quite a few common interests. on my second day of work, we were talking about school, family, ambition, love, relationships, volunteering and we even sneaked to the storeroom to have grapes! but, while talking to her, i can't help but sigh. jacq, you're aging. you're 20, just two years away from being like her, twenty two years old. i'm no longer a teen, not nineteen anymore. with age comes maturity and responsibility. these things ain't not good and i would like very much to grow as a deeper person, to think more maturely and be responsible for my parents etc. but i'm still the childish girl who still yearns to stay in neverneverland. i don't want to give up the fun things a teen is allowed to do and the carefree days that teenage guarantees. but yea, i'm just whining. growing up needs getting used to and i'm learning.

"fast friends," geok casually mentioned yest. how does one define that?
i often "safe-guard" myself when making new friends (outside school), being more wary and less willing to share so much of my personal stuff. is it the self-protecting mechanism or am i too sensitive? i feel guilty sharing less about myself but i cant help but be more cautious. yuki and i are planning a lib trip during our next break time together and we're hoping to volunteer together too. i'm excited but apprehensive at the same time.

and lately, i feel like a schizo. i talk myself to believing things i want myself to.

oh yes, i'm extremely excited about def's (our club name after we step down from abc) kl trip!
i'm flooded with lotsa information! numbers, links and plenty of suggestions!!! :D thanks for the prompt reply and all the research, guys! it gets anyone energized! i foresee another fabulous getaway! in the making :)


my postcard to entice them. hurhur.

geex. this entry is really long but i'm not done yet! LOL!
yest's pre-zoukout was crazy! it was sucha last min thing but fun all the same. most of the time, the five of us (geok shin jeremy daryl and i) were at phuture which thankfully wasn't as packed yest, as compared to on mambo days. the main zouk area was playing trance music :( and daryl had commented that they're still playing the same song when we popped by again before we left. at phuture, music got much better towards the end! and dancing has always felt this good. i was so glad i heard "no one" by alicia keys! :D after that, shin and geok came my place to stay-over. good sleep though i was sandwiched betw two fatty cushions. LOL. just kidding.

today and tomorrow are the highlight for this week! club rainbow :) i dont know what to expect! -beams-




everything's gonna be alright. right


it's been a madrush of events after exams. too much has happened, mostly fun stuff! :D geok has blogged about almost everything that we did so i felt i would almost be doing a duplicate should i blog about the past few days! but she left out the free ice-cream incident at sentosa! LOL LOL! :D that should be censored for the convo really didnt reflect very well on us. we were very much like amanda in ugly betty. you get the hint. and there was also gang outing with new co-pimp fish on sat! i cant wait to get photos of our candid shots and also my snowman candyfloss! :D

this week promises more goodies cause we've got our job, which is our much-needed income! :D and there's mambo, if the sinseh performs a miracle on my aching foot. then there's first day of work to look forward to and club rainbow in the weekends! AHH! that's my most anticipated activity :D



these days, i can hardly find a song that i really wanna hear.
there are too many tunes singing in my head.


quite a bit of stuff has happened since i last blogged, mostly shopping though. LOL. but i still have things i haven't bought and my funds are depleting! this calls for a job and i'm torn up between two! one's a better paying but boring accts asst job which wendy recommended while the other is a hairdye promoter which will give my hair a new coat of paint! hownowbrowncow???

anw, i just got back not too long ago, from sending sistie off at the airport. she's flying to new york for a month and spending white x'mas there! it would be really fun for her but for me, this would be the time to get used to not having her around the house for six months from feb next year. ): ): ):

i've been a real lazy person lately. (wait, not lately. i've always been a bum! ): ) i wake up at 12 and plans dont follow cause i simply just sleep past them. so today, i didnt have a blood morning and neither did i meet jer for high tea. ): geex. shall postpone blood morning to tuesday, if all goes well! :D and i've gotta plan kl, visit grams and plan tuition too. there's also catching up with ugly betty and my much-missed wentworth miller and starting on heroes! -slurps- i love holidays! :D

p.s. this must be one of those random posts again. it happens when i don't have much to blog about and i end up just relating what happened in the past few days, just because i really wanna post an entry. :X
and while doing up sis' blog, i chanced upon this really happy photo!

blissful couple

I watched the proverbial sunrise
Coming up over the Pacific and
You might think I'm losing my mind,
But I will shy away from the specifics...

'cause I don't want you to know where I am
'cause then you'll see my heart
In the saddest state it's ever been.

This is no place to try and live my life.

Stop right there. That's exactly where I lost it.
See that line. Well I never should have crossed it.
Stop right there. Well I never should have said
That it's the very moment that
I wish that I could take back.

I'm sorry for the person I became.
I'm sorry that it took so long for me to change.
I'm ready to be sure I never become that way again
'cause who I am hates who I've been.
Who I am hates who I've been.
Relient k

Was it not enough stimulation
Hit by a brick the other day, just when I thought that I'm okay
You didn't like myyyyy conversation
I can't come up with something new
It doesn't really matter what I do
Angela Ammons

Everybody go
The party's over
I want to be alone in my head
Fools like me, Lisa Loeb